It really is like The Matrix. I’m walking around in a world that doesn’t exist, interacting with people who also don’t exist. THIS is the rabbit hole! And YOU, if you exist at all, move in YOUR own matrix-world. I used to think that if I could have a secret superpower, I would want it to be invisibility. (Freud would have a heyday with that one!) But now I know that I just want to disappear completely, after saving a made-up world from my own perceiving. Salvation of my world depends on me because I’m the one who made it up, and the only one who can let it go–forgive it and forget it. Apparently, I’ve never left my padded cell.
Whether my picture of reality is correct or not, the Work remains the same. Our Text reading today says, “Any relationship in which the body enters is based not on love, but on idolatry.” There is no relationship but the one I have with my Father, and if MY body enters it, even if only from my perspective, then every perspective I have is wrong. I think that in the Course we can often trade the word “see” for “value.” If I see my brother as a body, I value him as a body. But if the importance I place on my relationship with someone is about who they are (easily illustrated by the long-distance relationship I have with Maya, whom I have not seen in 9 years), then I value her rather than see her as a mere character in my play. She’s one of the better parts of me.
In my current relationship with God, my secret superpower IS to disappear, to approach God as one of many aspects of the One Son–I know this sounds contradictory. It is our singularity that makes us one, and our idolatry that makes us seem to be many. What works best for me right now is to assume that each one of you is an aspect of me, and I can save you and save the world by saving me. “Homeless, the ego seeks as many bodies as it can collect to place its idols in, and so establish them as temples to itself.” One ego, plus all of us bodies, equals me. In What is the World?, the Workbook says, “[The world] will remain no longer than the thought that gave it birth is cherished.” The thought, one thought–mine. Once I let it go, the world ceases to exist, including a separate me. “We must save the world. For we who made it must behold it through the eyes of Christ, that what was made to die can be restored to everlasting life.” ACIM T-20.VII, and Lesson 241.